Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Whale shit????

So, one of my coworkers just went to Sea World with his family and he told me that they went to the Shamu show there. He told us that they were front row center and got soaked by the big killer whale splashing them. And all I could think was, "that's pretty nasty, what about all the whale piss and dookie that's floating in that water". But then I had a question jump into my head. What the hell does whale shit look like? I've seen other animals at the zoo take dumps, but I've never seen a whale or dolphin do it at an aquarium or at a place like Sea World. So I looked it up. So here's the quick answer, whale shit is not like a giant turd, it's more like bird shit, with little chunky bits sprinkled in. Whales actually absorb most of the waxy/non-soluble stuff that other animals push out in the form of dookie ropes, and only those little bits that they don't actually absorb get pushed out. Imagine diarrhea "poop juice" with fiber sprinkles. Here's some pics and a link to a video showing the chunky parts.

Monday, March 3, 2008

Buffet Idea

All you can eat. That's what it says, but do they mean it. What if I went to a buffet and didn't leave? Maybe I want to start at breakfast and stay 'til dinner. What then buffet manager? Are you gonna try to kick me out? You had better not, because that's not all I can eat. Hell, I might just bring a cot and stay there overnight and start all over. I'm sure I couldn't be eating anymore than those 400 pound, grazing, buffet killers I see everytime I eat at one. A word of advice buffet people -- be sure to write in your advertisement if there really is a limit, be it time or amounts or whatever. I've already been kicked out of "Sizzler" for apparently eating too much all you can eat shrimp.

<-- My sleeping equipment for the restaurant

Oh yeah, and one more thing. I think there should be weight limits on those that hit up the buffet. Both on how much you put on your plate at one time and your big ass when you get there. If you're over 350, 5'8", and out of shape, then you about face your tubby ass and walk right to a salad restaurant.